There's No Place I Would Rather Be

I am listening to the live worship streaming at the International House of Prayer as I often do.  Tonight the worship leader is singing this line, "There's no place I would rather be than here in your love..."  As I sit thinking about that, I am really able to sing those words from a deep place of submission to a loving Father.  This has been a difficult year for me in many ways.  Parenting 6 very different kids from a teen to a non-sleeping baby has really tested me on many levels.  Actually, I have come to understand better in the last few weeks that it is not about me and my abilities at all.  It is about Jesus and His crazy love for me and my kids.  I can never be the perfect parent and I can never be strong enough on my own.  Of course I have known these things for years, but somehow that has not stopped me from trying to accomplish them.  Jesus said it so simply when he was asked about the greatest commandment.  Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength.  And the second is like it: love your neighbor (your kids) as yourself.  So why do I strive so much??  I guess the actual doing of it is much more difficult in this body of sin and weakness than reading it, agreeing with it, or even wanting it!
 So I want to know how high and deep and wide is the love of God, to know this love that passes knowledge (Eph 3) and I want to be so consumed with His love, so filled to full measure of God (also Eph 3) that I overflow with His love.  If I really know His love, I can only respond by loving him back.  And as He loves me and I love Him, then His love will spill out of me without all of the striving.  And I can mess up and be weak and still love!  That is the beauty of love!  Jesus didn't say to be perfect or to follow all these rules or to never get overwhelmed.  He said LOVE!  What a beautifully difficult pursuit!
And so as I sit here listening and worshiping, I can truly say that there is no place I would rather be.  Even though this season of my life is hard, and I feel overwhelmed and inadequate sometimes, this is the place where God is!  Right here, right in this hard moment, right in each day of this whole hard year.  There is no place where I would rather be because God is near to those with a broken and contrite heart, because God says to count it all joy when we face trials of many kinds, because God is my rock, my stronghold, my strength.  I would not have chosen this way, but then who would?  I am such a pleasure/comfort junkie!  But God has sustained me in each day of this hard season.  I have many times looked back and marveled at God's grace!  And I don't know how much longer this season will continue, but it's really ok. Until recently, I was really frustrated and discouraged about some of the circumstances I am facing.  But, He led me here and he has sustained me this long.  I can trust Him!  I cling to Jesus and His faithfulness.  Not my strength, to grit my teeth and survive through it.  God is working in me.  "For our light and momentary troubles (if Paul could say this, surely I can, too!) are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all."  2 Cor 4:17
So tonight I sing honestly from my heart, "There's no place I would rather be than here in your love, God."  Right here, experiencing your love.